Getting Away with Not-so-literal Murder {3}

Toxicity

 
Yes. It's a word she became acquainted with quite rapidly because she is a fast learner. 
 
She studied. Took a week of personal time, from work, and for the first time in her artistic life, spent more time in a library that entire week than her entire life. 
 
Teaching herself.
 
Thus began her learning. Here she was professor and student day in and day out—AFTER dropping her children off at Daycare.  These were the days her  eyes opened. These were the days they remained—wide open. These were the days, fear became prevalent. Where fear wasn't just a feeling it began succumbing her. 
 
It all started that day she went to her doctors office and while giving a urine sample there above the toilet the tiny brochure, small enough to hide inside her wallet, (if necessary,) and fit in the palm of her hand like a business card. Ten of the 12 bullet points, stung her as she read—like a knife to her gut and then to her chest near her heart. And then she sweat, in wonder, wide-eyed wonder—not possible...not me. Denial. 
 
Denial is what brought her to the library to study—to prove herself and her self-inflicted fear wrong. [Fear is an illusion, remember.] Was it self-inflicted! Was she just crazy! #12 hadn't ever happened. But #11 was moments away, what would stop 12, she thought. Yes, it was easier to be crazy than to admit what she was reading in the tiny little pamphlet that fit in her brave hand. 
 
I mean, come on—
HE NEVER HIT HER. 
She must be crazy. 
THIS is crazy. 
 
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Comments

  1. SEC

    That Egyptian river is oh so tempting a swim.

    April 13, 2013
    1. drivefaastakechances

      And she could hold her breath long…

      April 13, 2013
  2. Zaphod

    This is an interesting journey…. and she learn she was a victim of abuse?

    April 13, 2013
  3. This comment has been deleted
  4. funfreak

    This is so frighteningly real.

    April 14, 2013
    1. drivefaastakechances

      Only reason I’m tellin it sister, and I’m sorru

      April 14, 2013
      1. funfreak

        I think there’s real value in repeating the tale. Both genders benefit from the telling, especially when it comes from women who are regarded as intelligent, grounded and strong.

        April 14, 2013
        1. drivefaastakechances

          I know you get this. They can take us down—SUBTLY, overtime—simply because we love them.

          April 21, 2013