It's Friday—Somebody tell me about love

As she tastes her way through living life

She started to notice
A fair amount of discretion 
in men
In life
In people 
And food
Her food
 
Parting chunks
And splitting hairs
Here
She wondered 
Whether she'd make it—
Knowing what she knows
 
Once she sees it
she can't not see it—
The same goes for taste 
 
The horrendous thing about getting older and noticing the pause
 
The men
O
Pause
 
Noticing
not embracing
So unlike her
 
god must be a gay male
she reasoned, perhaps
No straight man would 
Make a woman horny as hell
And then dry her up like a cactus
she chuckled, and
no woman would dare do this to another woman
 
Hot flashes
not that she had them
Panic attacks
well she had always had those and
The list goes on
Emotion upswings and downswings
affecting her relationships especially with her kids the most important at this point in her life
No woman should go through this alone
She notices
 
But the one thing she notices–more
is that her mind
Is constantly on the rise
Constantly wanting to learn
And grow
And expand
More now than ever
 
and so when it's quiet
she notices 
 
Why all the yelling
 
Stop yelling at me
What did I do to you 
You act as if I did
something, unappealing
when I just want
to get my point across
 
It's never enough
its never enough
 
I never do enough
When you get like this
The arrogance is astounding 
Why is it what I am doing or in the middle of is less important than you showering and needing toothpaste, suddenly toothpaste you brought home from your fathers where is the toothpaste I buy and like that you took from my corner of the sink
You moved it—
or am I losing my mind
fits more likely than latter
 
 
It's never enough 
You seem to say
Just like your father, did
Can't you see I'm in the middle of doing something else, no you can't. 
And can't I see that that is merely your phase in life—
hopefully
 
You have to let her go
Let her go on her feelings
About it
Let her go even if 
She misunderstood
 
It's never enough
Playing over and over 
In her head
 
Give up
Only to give in
Because its easier 
Than saying 
No
 
Or explaining
 
I can't bare the thought of having raised a narcissist 
hopefully not 
 
let me leave out the details
on that one
 
tell me, dear one, however
the details of your love
 
today
i love to sit and listen 
i've got mental time
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Comments

  1. dreamshadow59

    Not having kids opr a husband, it;s difficult for me to make it all better with just some glowing words of wisdom. Just KNOW that I am ALWAYS here to talk to or listen if you just need to spout off. You KNOW I love ya and want nothing more in this life for you than happiness….Talk to me if you need a sympathetic ear Sis…Muah…

    May 10, 2013
    1. drivefaastakechances

      Sweetie I love the way to reach out the way you do… I felt you kindness run deeply and sincere. Thank you from the bottom of my heart

      May 11, 2013
      1. dreamshadow59

        I was just really worried about you after I read that sis…

        May 11, 2013
  2. funfreak

    First, no woman does go through it alone……….we are all here for you. The whole sisterhood. No mean girls, just sisters who nod their head and hand you a glass of pinot and maybe even a fan. “She” is not a narcissist……..she is evolving, just like we did. Hormones make us crazy and energetic and youthful and horny and impulsive and nurturing and……and……and when they start to go……….they force us to find another way to maintain all those feelings. Some of us don’t. They gracefully move into the next phase (notice how we are always in one phase or another!). Some of us refuse to let go of all that energy and excitement. They (oh, who am I kidding? WE…) find ways to maintain those motivators…….those stimulants. We don’t do anything gracefully. We learn EVERYTHING the hard way and we never stop learning. We are students of life. And, we are trying to be teachers at the same time. Ya think it easy?!? LOL! God is definitely a gay man. Why didn’t I think of that!

    May 10, 2013
    1. drivefaastakechances

      What an incredible colleague of understanding you have built for me, for us, here. How do I thank you for this outpouring of understanding, my dear woman. As i was simply looking for others to tell a tale of some sort of happiness —and what I got from you was exponential and unexpected. I adore you and your grasp, understanding and profound knowledge

      May 11, 2013
  3. withwings


    I do love this post. It contains so many things. So many parts. Im partial to the toothpaste part. And I love your gay male reasoning. And the ending was so sweet.

    May 10, 2013
    1. drivefaastakechances

      I love you, gay male understanding and toothpaste. thank you my dear for reading and replying.

      May 11, 2013
  4. greunie

    ER… what Freaky said… er… all except for the God is a gay man! God is not a male! Males have interpreted God for all of us… er… touchy point with me, I know you meant it in jest. Expressive and honest write, I loved reading it.

    May 10, 2013
    1. drivefaastakechances

      Lower case god. and I love that you give me sh*te when it’s due I need a good laugh. I am always learning and laughing with you my dear.

      May 11, 2013
  5. KGL

    Panic attacks are scary.

    May 11, 2013
    1. drivefaastakechances

      That they is!

      May 11, 2013
  6. MindLint

    If we all understood love, wouldn’t this be a wonderful world? A place of peace and tranquility? We tread lightly until we find that one who can give us the love we desire and we then return it in kind. That is my wish for you!

    May 12, 2013
    1. drivefaastakechances

      Toby you words are so sweet and kind and always continually hopeful. Thank you dear man—btw I love your new avatar.

      May 13, 2013
  7. Munkyman

    Chocolate, melted with coconut oil, blended with rich molasses & drizzled over blueberries & freshly whipped creme chantilly spiked with amaretto.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lOEIRI5HSuQ

    May 21, 2013
  8. drivefaastakechances

    Hmmm, although I am not much of an amaretto fan that sounds like decadent….the song is grand as you may know I like it very much…the song that was playing over and over in my head while I wrote this was:
    http://vimeo.com/27804205

    May 22, 2013